Four Months

Video of Ian "swimming"...his new favorite activity since he learned to splash.

Four months.  That's how long it has been since my little miracle entered this world.  My blog renovations aren't quite complete yet, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to provide a proud IF mommy update.

Ian went to his four month baby wellness appointment with the pediatrician today.  He is 16 pounds and 4 ounces, putting him somewhere between the 75th and 90th percentile for weight.   And that's on the full term baby growth chart...Ian grew out of the premie growth chart (that they told me he would always be judged on) months ago.  His height on the other hand...let's just say my guy is a "Little Teapot"...as in "Short and Stout."  He is 24 inches today.  I was 22 inches when I was BORN!  His doctor isn't worried about his height in the slightest, so I'm not going to let myself be upset about it, either.  He is ahead of the curve developmentally and healthy as a horse.  That's all that matters.

He is officially wearing size 6 to 9 month clothing.  He was in size 3 to 6 month clothing for all of three weeks.  Lots of people told me to leave the tags on clothes until he actually was ready to wear the clothes, so I could take back what he never wore.  I didn't listen...washing everything out of excitement every time he moved up a size.  I REALLY should have listened.  We could start a college fund for him with the value of all of the clothes that I washed and he never even got to wear once.  Even though he needs to move up to the size 6 to 9 month clothing so that it will fit around his rotund belly, all of his pants are about four inches too long for him.  I suppose I should learn to sew so that I can hem the pants.  But, realistically, my poor guy is probably just going to have to wear rolled-up pant legs until he's old enough to protest about it (or until one of his buddies tells him it is uncool).

Speaking of buddies, Ian has recently started attending get-togethers with other IF babies.  He's still a bit too young to actually play, but he likes to watch the other babies and it won't be long before he's drooling on toys with the rest of them.  It is really amazing to see the joy of the IF mommies that I spent years in the trenches with, as they watch over and love their little miracles.  None of us wanted or deserved to be part of the IF club, but as we move forward in our journeys together, it is so wonderful to watch as one at a time dreams come true and amazing parents are born.  We are all so appreciative, so full of awe, and so acutely aware of how blessed we are, in a way that I think is rare to find outside of the IF survivor community.

I've had four months to bask in the joy and gratitude of finally being a mom, worried that those feelings would fade when the "newness" of having a baby wore off.  I'm happy to say that those feelings haven't faded yet.  My love just grows by leaps and bounds each day.  One year ago today, we were just getting started on the meds for my donor egg cycle...the one that would lead to my pregnancy.  So, for those of you out there who are still in the trenches and struggling to hold onto hope, please know that miracles happen and when they do...it is all worth it.  Every needle stick, every broken heart, every tear, every sleepless night, every fight with your spouse, every negative pregnancy test...all worth it when you finally get to feel the love of being a mom.