A Little Bit of This...A Little Bit of That

Lots of things have happened since my last post. Here’s the quick highlights version (I don’t have the energy for anything better than that):

• My mother-in-law announced my pregnancy on her Facebook page and, after receiving messages and questions from people who saw her post, I decided it was time to announce my own pregnancy.  I believe I made a tasteful and sensitive announcement…I hope so.  I would be lying if I said that it doesn’t feel wonderful to have everyone know about my pregnancy and to see the outpouring of love and support from family and friends.  Also, I was surprised to find out that many people knew (or at least suspected) that The Prince and I were struggling to get pregnant.  The beautiful messages of support and sincere congratulations have helped me to be a little more at peace with what we went through during those three long years of infertility.  I’m realizing that I wasn’t as alone as I had thought.

• My hyperemesis came back last night and this morning…with a vengeance.  I thought I had at least gotten past that aspect of the “rough pregnancy.”  No such luck.  For whatever reason, my blood vessels all burst in my face this time, so I have giant red spots and blotches in certain areas, and tiny freckle-looking spots in other areas.  Perhaps the worst is that a blood vessel broke in my eye, so it looks like I have some disease that is causing me to cry tears of blood (no blood is actually coming out of my eye…but it is down in that part of my eye…not pretty).  I’m embarrassed and tired of the HG.  But, I’m determined to beat this, so I am going to just keep eating and drinking, no matter how many times I get sick.  I’m determined not to end up back in the hospital.  I also just keep rubbing my belly to remind myself that there is a lot of good going on along with the bad.

• The Prince and I had an argument last night about the “doula” issue.  He believes (with all his vast medical knowledge) that I am going to end up having a planned C-section because of all of my surgeries, adhesions, etc.  Accordingly, he feels the money we would spend on a doula could be better spent on other things.  I am sympathetic with his position about the money, but, even if he ends up being right about the C-section…which is a big IF, I’ve read about the support a doula offers during C-sections…and I want that support!  The father travels with the baby to the nursery, after the baby is taken out of the belly, and the mom remains on the table for 45 minutes to an hour, being stitched up, usually with no information about what is going on with the baby (and The Prince knows this because his sister just went through it).  When you have a doula, she stays with the mom in the OR and coordinates with the medical staff to give the mom updates on the baby’s progress.  She can also advocate for the fastest possible return of the baby, so that the bonding and breastfeeding can happen as quickly after birth as possible.  I want that!  I printed out articles for The Prince to explain why it is in his best interest for us to have a doula and we had a more civil conversation about the issue this morning.  He (possibly to avoid having to read the articles) has agreed to let me pursue whatever option makes me the most comfortable.  Hopefully he will stick with that…as I’ve already contacted three doula candidates to set up interviews.  I’m really hopeful that, during one of the interviews, everything will click and we will just know who we are meant to share our miracle with.

• I got the three egg donation children’s books that I ordered.  One of them is a glorified pamphlet…the size of a CD cover…and I could have written it in my sleep.  Very disappointing.  The other two are a little better.  Having the books gave me this weird proud feeling about our choice of using egg donation to conceive.  I thought the books might make me sad, as they would sort of “confirm” that I am going to tell our child that there was a third party involved in the child’s conception.  But that isn’t how I felt at all.  Instead, I felt confident in our decision to raise our child always knowing about his or her origin.  I feel ready for this…and the egg donor part of our story (at least for now) doesn’t scare me.

That’s about it.  I have no other exciting news to report and nothing clever to write about.  I’m really hoping that my second trimester honeymoon period kicks in soon and I can get back to being the blogger that I want to be…instead of writing my posts in a stupor.  Thanks to everyone who is sticking with me through this.